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Location: Praha, Czech Republic
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![]() I really, really, enjoyed Ed Wood. Everything about it was a total love letter to B movies
Over the top acting, the angles of shots, the shadows, atmosphere - everything! Even that terrifying Skeletor-woman Sarah Jessica Parker couldn't ruin it.
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Location: Krakeroy, Norway
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![]() New one:
Shark Attack 3 Megalodon ![]() (Horror, David Worth, Israel/SA /USA, 2002, colour) A giant, prehistoric shark makes it's sudden presence and wrecks havoc... Well, this is definitely not Jaws. This sharks (actually, there are two of them, both made pretty much entirely of stock footage of various species of sharks) is about 15 feet long when the mentioned stock footage allows it (15 feet? It's getting much bigger soon. Some 60 odd feet, actually). Anyway: A company is building a multi-billion underwater powerline network. Of course, these cables attract these two sharks from the mist of time to our present day (no explaination given here). Soon we have the same old conflict: Telling people about this shark will cost a packet, better shut up VS tons of shark chew (literally, tons!). You have seen this before, and in waaayyy better movies, so onto my Personal opinion: STAY AWAY!... not from the water, but from this movie. Good god, where to begin? A shark... a hero and a heroine... countless victims... ze big bozz who's interests dictates there are no sharks there... random scenes packed with nonsense... bloopers kept for the sake of run-time, a shark so huge it eats whole boats without chewing... some of the most abysmal, abominable and atrocious acting ever put on film... and yes, it's true: This movie has the singlemost disturbingly, mindtwistingly trash pick-up line in history... and no, I will not try to explain any possibility of a greater plot here or give explainations to the unexplainable. The only moments that give this flick a shred of entertainment value, are the bloopers and the insanly lousy special effects, as well as that pick-up line. EDIT: From IMBD: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0313597/goofs Enjoy the read, and let it go with that. Don't bother watching this film.
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Je Suis Charlie Last edited by Mighty Midget; 22-01-2008 at 08:04 PM. |
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#3 | ||
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![]() I thought I was the only one who'd sat all the way through Megalodon...
One of those rare films that actually passes right through so bad it's good into a movie that manages to bore and enrage simultaneously. |
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#4 | ||
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![]() Exactly! I mean, I don't mind trash movies, not at all, but as you said: This movie does manage to bore and enrage simultaneously... I didn't know exactly what to expect and was hoping for that "so terrible it's great" but it pissed me off instead. 90 minutes completly wasted.
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Je Suis Charlie |
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#5 | ||
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![]() Two movies on last night that qualify for this thread, I reckon.
My Primary was "Dungeons and Dragons 2: The Elemental Might", and during the adverts there was "Maniac Nurses Find Ecstacy". D&D2 is about an evil sorceror who got cursed to undeath by his dead master for failing at something they don't bother to explain. He gets fixed right at the start of the film, so you might think this means it doesn't matter but it actually does. Evil sorceror finds a gem containing the soul of a dragon god and that makes him really powerful, and even worse it's going to wake up the dragon god. Oh no! The hero gets the king of whatever kingdom needs saving to get him a party. An attractive lady barbarian, an attractive elf lady wizard, a cleric who isn't around for long and a short, dirty rogue. The dialogue is bad... It randomly goes off to explain fundamentals of D&D like when hero asks his girlfriend what she's doing she goes off on one about how there are 2 kinds of magic and then goes on to describe them. His girlfriend is a mage, and she's an attractive lady. Party goes off, and on the way get attacked by a dragon. Dragon kills the cleric, then the rest kill the dragon. They then go on to bitch about evil sorceror's treachery, obviously unaware that an evil sorceror they've never heard of, let alone met, isn't in a position to betray them. Then the leader, now aware that rushing off to fight a powerful evil sorceror intent on destroying the world might result in some of them getting hurt, asks if they're sure they want to continue. They all agree they do, so they can repay evil sorceror's treachery. It goes on, we get some crap about ancient mages of tulac imprisoning the dragon god a thousand years ago, but it took a toll and they died out. Girlfriend gets undead cursed, but she figures out the ancient mages used faith to beat the dragon, so she manages to destroy the dragon god by holding up a small orb. This is well done, because the ancient mages used faith too and they could only imprison it and even that killed them. In summary, the acting and dialogue and directing were all muck. Maniac Nurses Find Ecstacy was about a bunch of nurses who go crazy and walk around killing people with automatic weapons in their lingerie. |
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#6 | ||
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![]() <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(chumloofah @ Aug 26 2007, 01:06 PM) [snapback]306784[/snapback]</div>
Quote:
That D&D movie sounds quite fun, actually. Just insane enough to work as entertainment ...and that last one
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#7 | ||
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![]() <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(chumloofah @ Aug 26 2007, 01:06 PM) [snapback]306784[/snapback]</div>
Quote:
I once watched an amateur parodic D&D movie made by D&D players. Now that was hilarious, but I'm not sure I remember the name right now (The Roleplayers?).
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#8 | ||
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![]() Quote:
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[14-12, 16:08] TotalAnarchy: but the greatest crime porn has done is the fact that it's all fake and emotionless, that's why I prefer anime hentai frankly |
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![]() <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Tulac @ Aug 26 2007, 02:43 PM) [snapback]306807[/snapback]</div>
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[14-12, 16:08] TotalAnarchy: but the greatest crime porn has done is the fact that it's all fake and emotionless, that's why I prefer anime hentai frankly |
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![]() <div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Tulac @ Aug 27 2007, 12:36 PM) [snapback]307023[/snapback]</div>
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